Sunday, December 23, 2007

Day and Night

Day and night man, day and night. One minute I think my whole relationship is over, and then last night the Lady says to me, “So what are we gonna do?” I’m sitting here stunned, because I’m thinking to myself “You ended things the other day. I thought what we were going to do was break up?” I was already mentally prepared for it to be over, and now I get this. How do I respond? I basically told her it’s her call. But I’m standing firm, no begging or pleading. I refuse. I have too much pride, and I think I lost my integrity for a long time trying to please her. And the more people I meet, the more I realize, there are enough people out there who like me the way I am, and there has to be a reason for that. She’s been sleeping in the office/guest room the last three nights, and she left the door open for the first time last night. Maybe she was expecting me to come into the room, console her and tell her all the things she wants to her. I didn’t do it though. I went into our bedroom, put on the Office dvds (to drown out the noise from the old people who can’t hear their tv or each other) and turned off the lights. I left the door open as well, so that if she wanted to talk or even lay down she could. But I had no company last night, and she is still curled up in the office as I write this. As much as I say it’s her decision, I think I need to make mine as well. I gotta lighten things up a little, here's a dance montage from Scrubs that always makes me smile...

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